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Category: Relationships

Mend Fences

Mend Fences

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Mend Fences-a while fence around a field, clouds overheadI love fences.

I know some people say, “Don’t fence me in,” meaning they want their freedom. I like freedom too. Still, I enjoy the beauty of fences.

  • Fences give order.
  • They look neat.
  • Sometimes they provide safety.

However, we need to mend (repair) fences occasionally.

  • Fences break.
  • They need paint.
  • Animals damage them.
  • They start leaning the wrong way.
  • They get dirty.

If we don’t mend them, they won’t stay safe, neat, orderly, and beautiful.

Occasionally we need to mend fences in our relationships.

  • We disagree, argue, or fight.
  • We neglect one another.
  • Hard times hurt us.
  • We let others lead us the wrong way.
  • We betray one another.

We mend fences when we improve our relationships.

How do we do that? We learn to:

  • Disagree without arguing or fighting
  • Spend special time together
  • Refuse to follow bad examples
  • Support one another through hard times
  • Apologize when we do wrong

Of course, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If we take care of our relationships every day, we don’t have to spend so much time mending them. That seems a small price to pay for a safe, neat, orderly, beautiful relationship.

“Turn us back to You, O Lord, and we will be restored; Renew our days as of old” (Lamentations 5:21 NKJV).

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Tackle It

Tackle It

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Tackle it-football tackle
Courtesy of Jordan Alves

Tackle it. Get started. Get the job done. Don’t wait.

When we tackle anything, we try to solve a problem or complete a job.

  • Sometimes we tackle problems with our brains.
  • Other jobs we tackle with physical work.
  • Perhaps hardest to tackle are relationships with other people.

In football, tackle is both a noun and a verb. Football tackles (players) tackle (stop) players on the other team. We will focus on the verb.

A tackle has two purposes:

  1. To keep the other team from scoring
  2. To help our team score

Some tackles are easy. Some are hard.

Coaches, cheerleaders, and fans cheer for their team during a game. Cheering encourages the team to play their best.

Like football, the jobs we tackle may be easy or hard.

Either way, why not cheer for one another? Why not encourage one another to do our best? Encouragement improves both our attitudes and actions.

We tackle life better with support.

Often when we tackle life’s problems alone, we get down in the dumps. A kind word or a smile may be all we need to get out of the dumps and ready to go again.

“Encourage one another and build each other up” (1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV).

Thanks to Joy Taylor for the suggestion.

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Worry Wart

Worry Wart

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Worry Wart-fallen tree covered in weedsI don’t want warts on my skin. Neither do I want to be a worry wart. Both can annoy us.

Worry warts worry all the time.

Sometimes they worry about what has happened or is happening. Often they borrow trouble  – they worry about problems that could happen.

Their worries include:

  • Health
  • Personal relationships
  • The weather
  • Money
  • Death

Worry warts worry about everything.

We have trees behind our house.

  • I can enjoy their shade and beauty. Or I can worry that a tree may fall on my house.
  • I can enjoy the animals that live among those trees. Or I can worry that one will bite me or give me a disease.
  • I can enjoy the leaves as they change colors. Or I can worry about having to rake all those leaves when they fall.

The tree in this photo did fall. However, it was old and rotten inside. It was far from the house, so the fall was no problem. We cut our trees when we think they may cause problems. The other trees we choose to enjoy.

Why worry?

Marian Woosley lived and taught a good plan for life. One of her favorite expressions was, “Why worry when we can pray?” That’s a good question, don’t you think?

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6 NIV).

Thanks to Debbie Tapscott for the suggestion.

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Good Old Days

Good Old Days

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Good Old Days--old photo of little girl holding dollSome people want life like it was years ago.

They wish for the good old days. They remember mostly good times from their past. Many desire the freedom of childhood.

The good old days were good in many ways.

  • Close family relationships
  • No need to lock doors
  • Home-cooked meals with friends
  • A more relaxed schedule

Yet, the good old days were not all good.

  • No air conditioning
  • Fewer health services
  • Poor transportation
  • No telephones or electricity in some areas

When life gets hard, people often wish for simpler times.

Much of life in the past was simpler. Plus, people get so busy with all of today’s gadgets that we forget one another.

Personal contact may be what people miss most about the good old days.

  • Taking time to talk, laugh, cry, and do nothing together
  • Looking at one another instead of cell phones or tablets
  • Asking, “How are you?” and then stopping to listen

Why can’t today become one of those good old days?

Why can’t people take time for one another? That sounds like a good plan to me. What do you think?

“This is the day the Lord has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24 NKJV).

Do you have a favorite good old days memory? If so, please comment.

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What’s the Catch?

What’s the Catch?

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What's the Catch-colorful question marksIf I offer you something free, you may ask, “What’s the catch?”

It sounds too good to be true. You wonder if I expect something in return. Or, am I not telling you everything. What strings are attached?

  • Do I expect you to buy something?
  • Do I expect you to give me something
  • Why would I offer something for nothing?

Book cover: Beyond Bethlehem and Calvary, & What's the CatchDuring the month of August, I am offering you a chance to win a free copy of my book, Beyond Bethlehem and Calvary. The winner will be announced on August 30, 2016.

What’s the catch? Here it is:

  • For a chance to win, you must subscribe to receive my blog posts by e-mail. You can do that here or at the top right side of this page.
  • If you subscribed in the past, you are already entered for a chance to win.

Why would I want you to subscribe by e-mail?

  • Many of you watch for the Facebook, LinkedIn, or Twitter links to my blog each week.
  • However, you don’t always see those links.
  • If you subscribe by email, the posts will arrive in your inbox every Tuesday morning. You will not miss future posts.

Of course, if you win the book and enjoy it, I hope you will tell others. So, yes, I would like more people to buy the book too.

“God’s blessings are given to us by faith, as a free gift” (Romans 4:16 TLB).

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Down in the Dumps

Down in the Dumps

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Down in the Dumps--looking up through dark rocks No one enjoys being down in the dumps.

We don’t like to feel depressed or unhappy. Yet, we all get down in the dumps sometimes.

Darkness covers us, much like entering a cave with no lights. We wonder if life will ever get better.

A few people suffer depression because of a physical problem. Most of us simply have days we don’t enjoy as much as others.

  • Our car won’t start.
  • We argue with someone we love.
  • We have to work long hours.

Problems keep growing, and so does our bad mood.

Like an old dog, we growl at others.

  • We frown.
  • We fuss.
  • Nothing pleases us.

Because we feel down in the dumps, we often make others feel bad too.

We want them to share our misery. Yet, most of us have a choice.

Will we focus on our bad moments?

Or will we be thankful for all the good we still enjoy? We’ll talk more about that choice next week.

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God” (Psalm 42:5 NIV).

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Off Base

Off Base

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Off Base, little boy T-ball player with one foot on a baseRyder knows not to move his foot off base. If he does, a baseball player on the other team can tag him out.

In baseball, we never want to get off base.

We also:

  • Need to run fast from one base to the next.
  • Must touch all the bases to score a run.
  • Fail to score a run if we get tagged by the baseball between bases.

In life, we don’t want to get caught off base either.

If we are off base, we are wrong. If someone says we are way off base, they mean we are really wrong. We have made a big mistake.

For example, I am off base if I:

  • Believe I will never suffer when I make bad choices
  • Want good pay for poor work
  • Expect people to like me when I treat them badly

The bad news:

We all get off base from time to time.

The good news:

We can get back in the game and try again.

How do we get back on base?

I have been off base playing ball. I have been off base in life. I have learned hard but good lessons from both.

“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord” (Acts 3:19 NIV).

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Thanks to Karen Atwood for the photo.

The Other Side of the Coin

The Other Side of the Coin

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The Other Side of the CoinI’m not always right.

I wish I were, but I’m not. Therefore, I need to look at life from other points of view. I need to consider ideas other than my own — the other side of the coin.

By looking at the other side of the coin, I give myself the opportunity to grow. I may learn I was wrong. If not, I strengthen my original belief. I gain from either of those possibilities.

We don’t have to agree with others to remain friends.

Rather, we learn to disagree agreeably. My husband and I share many of the same values and beliefs. We also disagree on several issues. We have learned to accept that reality. Occasionally we begin a sentence with, “I know you’re going to disagree with this, but …”

I wonder:

  • How many wars could have been prevented by looking at the other side’s opinions?
  • How many couples could have avoided divorce by focusing on one another’s feelings?
  • How many friendships could have been preserved by listening more than talking?

Not everything in life revolves around us and our outlook.

Let’s not be hardheaded. Rather, let’s check out the other side of the coin. In the process we:

  • Stretch our minds.
  • Enrich our resources,
  • Share one another’s burdens and joys, whether we agree or not.

When we look at the other side of the coin, we gain another viewpoint. We choose whether to accept or reject that viewpoint. Let’s use wisdom as we choose.

“Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance” (Proverbs 1:5 NIV).

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As Good as Their Word

As Good as Their Word

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As Good as Their WordYears ago, people made many business deals with a handshake.

They were as good as their word. Their word — what they said — required no paperwork. They signed no contract. They hired no lawyer.

Everyone knew who was as good as their word. One of the greatest compliments was to be called an honest person.

Our world today has grown complicated.

Almost everyone uses contracts. Courts stay busy because people break contracts. Many people look for legal ways to avoid their responsibilities. Sometimes they get caught red-handed

Let’s win trust back.

  • Instead of avoiding the truth, let’s honor our word.
  • Instead of making excuses for our actions, let’s apologize when wrong.
  • Instead of helping only ourselves, let’s help one another.

We still have people as good as their word. Let’s join them.

Together we can:

  • Rebuild trust in one another.
  • Earn honest reputations.
  • Serve as positive examples for children and youth.

“Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment” (Proverbs 12:19).

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Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth

Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth

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Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth, horses in a fieldThe right response for any gift is Thank you.

We never want to act ungrateful. So, don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

Some people can tell a horse’s age by looking in its mouth. Checking a gift horse’s age is rude. So is inspecting any gift for problems. We might do that later when the gift giver is not with us. But don’t do it in the giver’s presence.

Remember a gift is a gift.

We don’t earn it. Therefore,

  • Be thankful for any gift.
  • Don’t compare it to other people’s gifts.
  • Don’t act like you wish for more.
  • Don’t worry about what it costs.
  • Keep an attitude of gratitude.

A gift’s price matters less than our love and concern for one another.

  • Give freely.
  • Express thanks often.
  • Focus on feelings, not finances.

“Always be thankful” (Colossians 3:15 NIV).

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