Relationships Archives - Page 32 of 35

Bottom Line

July 15, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

The bottom line on a financial statement shows the net profit or loss.

Therefore, when we ask, “What’s the bottom line?” we want to know the final cost or gain.

Businesses often advertise a low cost per month rather than the total cost. Two good questions to ask:

What will this cost if we pay the total now?
How much extra will this cost if we make payments?

Most of us like to buy items on sale. However, if we use our credit card, we need to pay the total bill when it arrives. If not, we may pay more than the item’s original price. Our bargain suddenly becomes a burden.

The bottom line applies to more than finances.

What are the costs and gains in our:

Behavior
Relationships
Jobs
Education
Spiritual life

Many choices are not worth the cost. Others are worth any cost.

In some countries, a decision to follow Jesus may involve great loss:

Rejection by family and friends
Denial of educational opportunities
Job loss
Imprisonment
Death

Yet, many people choose to follow Jesus anyway. They refuse to deny their faith. For them, eternity with God outweighs any temporary problems during this short life.

In every decision, count the cost. What’s the bottom line?

“What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?” (Matthew 16:26 NIV).

Thanks to Emily Akin for suggesting this expression.

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What a Hoot

July 8, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 3 comments

Isn’t that funny? “How amusing.” “That makes me laugh.” All these are nice, polite ways to say, “What a hoot!”

In my mind, what a hoot implies extra energy and fun.

Can’t you imagine the following?

Deep belly laughs
Body doubled over
Hands thrown in the air
Tears rolling
Embarrassing snorts

This group of ladies did not create the expression what a hoot. However, they certainly know how to live it. They understand that fun and laughter are not luxuries. Everyone needs them for a healthy and happy life.

Because their work involved a constant flow of problems, they took occasional breaks.

Sometimes they talked.
Sometimes they cried.
Sometimes they laughed to keep from crying.

They learned to look for those funny moments that happen every day. I know, because I worked with them.

We all need to laugh more.

Consider the benefits.

Laughing at ourselves and with others helps us through difficult situations.
Remembering fun times provides comfort in our sorrow.
Laughter gives us energy to finish a tiring job.
Playing harmless jokes on one another makes friendships stronger.
Laughter is contagious. If another person laughs, we usually laugh too.

Just thinking about this makes us smile, doesn’t it? Now, that’s a hoot!

“A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22 NIV).

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Horse of a Different Color

July 1, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 0 Comment

Have you ever talked with someone and their response had nothing to do with what you said? They were talking about a horse of a different color.

Have you ever bought something you thought you liked? However, later you realized it was not what you bought before? You bought a horse of a different color.

Has anyone ever invited you to a gourmet meal but took you to a fast food restaurant instead? That meal was a horse of a different color.

The traditional Swedish Dala in this photo is definitely a horse of a different color. We also find one in a brief scene from the Wizard of Oz movie. Both provide fun reminders of the totally different items and experiences our world offers. Both also remind us that different does not necessarily mean bad — simply unrelated.

The following may help us adjust to every difference, whether good or bad.

Listen well.
Observe carefully.
Expect the unexpected.
Don’t stress.
Accept what helps.
Reject what harms.

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows” (James 1:17 NIV).

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Get Your Goat

June 17, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

If I get your goat, I make you angry or upset.

Although Jenny and I both got a goat in this photo, we were definitely not angry or upset. What fun we had with Paul and Janet Hert at Green Hall Farm, feeding, holding, loving, and learning about goats.

I wish we would all relate to one another that way. Why do we choose to:

Annoy one another for no good reason?
Hurt others when we hurt?
Make fun of people different from us?

Why don’t we:

Seek the best for one another?
Help one another through good times and bad?
Celebrate our differences?

Like Jenny and I did with the Herts’ goats, let’s:

Feed one another when we’re hungry.
Hold one another when we hurt.
Love one another unconditionally.
Learn from one another’s life experiences.

“In that day the wolf and the lamb will lie down together, and the leopard and goats will be at peace. Calves and fat cattle will be safe among lions, and a little child shall lead them all” (Isaiah 11:6 TLB).

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Push All the Wrong Buttons

May 27, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 3 comments

As a person challenged by any kind of electronics, I often push all the wrong buttons. Regardless of the gadget, I can mess it up.

Cell phones
Laptops
Notebooks
Personal computers
Televisions remotes
Cameras
Microwaves

If it has buttons, I have problems. Nevertheless, I’m learning. I know I need help.

I seek guidance from people with more knowledge.
I review online tutorials.
I read my instruction book.
If all else fails, I seek help from the manufacturer – I go to the source.

Sadly, we have the same problem in relationships. We often push all the wrong buttons of other people.

We disobey rules.
We anger or upset one another.
We seek our own pleasure, regardless of who we hurt.

Let’s learn in relationships. Let’s recognize we need help.

Listen to wiser, more mature people.
Study ways to improve.
Read the Bible, the greatest instruction book in the world.
Go to our Creator – the source of all wisdom.

“Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths” (Psalm 25:4 NIV).

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Don’t Get Too Big for Your Britches

April 29, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

Don’t get too big for your britches has nothing to do with our height, weight, or the size of our pants. Rather, it warns us against having too much pride. Similar expressions tell us not to put on a high hat or act high and mighty.

When life goes well, we should certainly enjoy it. However, we don’t want to grow arrogant over our good fortune. Circumstances can quickly change.

Let’s maintain balance in our lives.

Celebrate success, but give credit to those who helped us succeed.
Enjoy financial gain but share that wealth with those in need.
Seek the occupation of our dreams but express appreciation for the work of others.
Strive for self-improvement but never at anyone else’s expense.

We all put our britches on one leg at a time.

No one deserves to be viewed as less worthy than anyone else. Likewise, no one deserves to be viewed as more worthy than others. Let’s treat everyone with the same respect we desire.

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18 NET).

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You Can’t Judge a Book by Its Cover

April 8, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 0 Comment

Have you ever wanted to throw a book in disgust? The title promised the help you needed. The cover picture looked perfect. Reviewers praised it. However, it was worthless to you. The difference in appearance and content prove you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Looking good does not equal goodness.

That’s true for books and true for life.

Businesses use misleading ads. Politicians make campaign promises they fail to keep. Much around us sounds or looks good … until we try them.

Good looking people who dress well get more job interviews. They also get more dates. They don’t always make the best employees or spouses.

Smooth, shiny hybrid apples look perfect. They don’t taste nearly as good as ugly, knotty vintage apples. The hybrid pleases the eye. The vintage gains our loyalty.

Like vintage apples, what looks bad on the outside may hide a treasure inside.

We find pearls in oysters. We find gold and silver in rocks. Don’t overlook possible treasures based simply on outward appearances.

Let’s look beyond the surface to find what matters most in life.

“People look on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7 NET).

Note: I found all the books in this photo true to their cover.

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From Here to Timbuktu

March 11, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

For a long time I thought Timbuktu was just a funny sounding name that symbolized any distant place.

If I wanted to tell someone how hard it was to get somewhere, I said it was like going from here to Timbuktu. That’s a lot farther than from here to yonder.

Imagine my surprise when I learned Timbuktu actually exists.

I also learned this town in Mali, West Africa is not the farthest from my home. Neither is it the hardest to reach.

I still love the name. Timbuktu has a unique sound, don’t you think?

A few years ago, a niece told me she has a friend who worked in Mali. I had a Timbuktu connection!

As my knowledge of geography grew, so did my awareness of my worldwide responsibility.

Whether I live here (wherever here may be for me) or around the world, I am one with other citizens of earth. We are all creations of our mighty God.

What a joy to love my brothers and sisters from here to Timbuktu!

How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity! (Psalm 133:1 NIV)

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We Reap What We Sow

March 4, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 8 comments

If we sow (or plant) tomato seeds, we reap (or harvest) tomatoes. If we sow corn seeds, we reap corn. If we sow bean seeds, we reap beans. If we sow flower seeds, we reap flowers. Do you see a pattern here?

Logic tells us that we reap what we sow.

That truth applies to behavior as well as gardens.

If we study hard, we make better grades.
If we practice regularly, we improve our performance.
If we work well, we advance in our career.

As with most of life, exceptions occur.

We can’t guarantee that our flower seeds will sprout and grow. Bad weather, hungry animals, and other conditions may result in a poor crop year. However, we can be certain that flower seeds will produce flowers, not potatoes.

Neither can we guarantee that positive behavior will always result in positive responses. In general, however, we live with the consequences of the choices we make — we reap what we sow.

If we ignore the rules, we get in trouble.
If we follow the rules, we stay out of trouble.
If we frown at people, they frown back.
If we smile at people, they smile back.
If we focus on the temporary, we reap temporary rewards.
If we focus on the eternal, we reap eternal rewards.

Let’s sow good seed, not just for our own sake but also for the sake of others.

Remember, whether beans or behavior, we reap what we sow.

“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows” (Galatians 6:7 NIV).

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Love is Blind

February 11, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 5 comments

On Valentine’s Day we give flowers, candy, stuffed animals, and other gifts to those we love. This special day also reminds us that love is blind.

We see people differently when we look through eyes of love.

We focus on their good traits and overlook the bad. This happens with boyfriends, girlfriends, spouses, and children. Because love is blind, we think our loved one is the smartest, cutest, sweetest person on earth.

That doesn’t mean we never see a person’s faults.

Yet, because we love them, we look for the best in them. We see what we want to see.

A 2004 scientific study verified that love is blind. The University College London found that love suppresses the part of our brain that controls critical thought.

We probably need some degree of blindness to keep loving feelings strong. At the same time, we need to take our blinders off when those faults become harmful. Then, we must clearly see what needs to change and take the steps to change it.

Teaching a child right from wrong requires a strong will. So does voicing concerns to a spouse.

True love is an act of the will, not emotion.

By working through difficult times, relationships grow.

True love says:

I will do what’s best for you, whether I feel like it or not.
I will do what’s best for you whether you deserve it or not.
I will do what’s best for you, because that’s how true love works.

Let’s be thankful love is blind to the little faults in one another. Let’s act with eyes wide open when true love requires it.

“For the LORD disciplines those he loves, just as a father disciplines the son in whom he delights (Proverbs 3:12 NET)

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