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At Loggerheads

At Loggerheads

At Loggerheads--loggerhead turtle on sandAt loggerheads has nothing to do with loggerhead turtles. Although we might enjoy finding the so-ugly-they-are-cute turtles, they give no insight into the idiom. Unless they fight.

At loggerheads means in conflict.

We disagree or argue and fail to resolve the problem. Probably one of the best-known examples of conflict between families is the Hatfield and McCoy feud.

Usually no one wins when at loggerheads.

As with the Hatfields and McCoys, strong disagreement often causes great suffering on both sides including violence or death.

In addition to families, quarrels or disputes occur among:

  • Friends
  • Co-workers
  • Countries
  • Organizations

The Free Dictionary gives two possible origins for the expression.

  1. “A ‘logger’ is a 16th-century term for a block of wood, so a ‘loggerhead’ is a blockhead or fool.”
  2. Loggerhead is also a late 1600s term for “a long-handled iron poker with a bulb-shaped end that was heated in the fire and used to melt pitch.” This “may have been alluded to as a weapon.”

Rather than remain at loggerheads, let’s seek solutions.

  • Compromise when possible.
  • Agree with the other person when we realize we are wrong.
  • Stand firm when necessary.
  • Follow Jesus’ example of self-giving love.

“Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs” (Proverbs 10:12 NIV).

Thanks to Sarah Burns Hampshire for the suggestion. Photo by Amy Farías with Pexels.

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Put to Bed

Put to Bed

Put to Bed--sleeping puppy on a hand-made cherry bedFollowing baths, brushed teeth, prayers, and other routines, children are put to bed every night.

Some of us also put our pets to bed. This puppy receives lots of love and care from its owner. A hand-made cherry bed waits anytime puppy needs a nap. Not a typical dog’s life.

We understand the literal meaning of put to bed.

People and animals need sleep. Going to bed may be voluntary or it may be required. Sometimes it serves as punishment for bad behavior.

It also means to stop discussing or arguing about an issue.

Whether we agree or disagree, we drop the subject. We let sleeping dogs lie.

It often means to complete all or part of an activity.

Final preparation begins or is already finished.

It’s a common saying for newspapers and other printing and means no more edits. Papers or books are ready to print.

The most important decision to put to bed is our eternal destination.

 We don’t want to leave our relationship with Jesus up in the air. At the end of the day, nothing matters more.

“Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:4 NIV).

Thanks to J.D. Wininger for the suggestion and to Ina Ree Pickett for the photo.

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Bury the Hatchet

Bury the Hatchet

Bury the Hatchet--a hatchet surrounded by pieces of woodHow I wish our world would learn to bury the hatchet. Divisions occur everywhere.

People have always disagreed, and that’s okay. However, why not learn to disagree agreeably? Instead, we:

  • Hate
  • Argue
  • Gossip
  • Fight

We war against one another with words and actions.

This happens among:

  • Family members
  • Friends
  • Neighbors
  • Cities
  • States
  • Countries

Bury the hatchet originated as a Native American tradition.

According to The Phrase Finder, “Hatchets were buried by the chiefs of tribes when they came to a peace agreement.” What a powerful symbol.

We can bury the hatchet too.

When we recognize destructive speech or behavior, we have a choice. We can follow the same pattern, or we can break the cycle.

Peace requires strength.

To choose not to harm another person or group of people calls for courage. If someone hurts us, our natural reaction is to hurt them. We are ready to lock horns. Yet, two wrongs don’t make a right. Suffering continues on both sides.

Jesus taught and lived love and forgiveness for everyone. Although not easy, that remains the only way to true and lasting peace.

“Consider the blameless, observe the upright; a future awaits those who seek peace” (Psalm 37:37 NIV).

Thanks to Ann Knowles for the suggestion. Image by Davie Bicker from Pixabay.

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Save Your Breath

Save Your Breath

Save Your Breath-two little boysSometimes you need to save your breath.

You know that no one will listen to what you say.

  • Talking will do no good.
  • Explaining will not help.
  • Arguing will probably make things worse.

A person not listening to you can be a good thing.

  • You may not have anything useful to say.
  • Your ideas may be wrong.
  • You don’t like to admit it, but you don’t always have the right answers.

A person not listening to you can also be a bad thing.

Most of the time, a person will listen.

That person may not like what you have to say. However, he or she will listen. Therefore:

“Let everything that has breath praise the Lord” (Psalm 150:6 NIV).

Do you have an expression you want explained or a thought about this one? If so, please comment below.

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Thanks to Joy Hamilton Hale and Mackenzie Smith for the cute photo.

Mend Fences

Mend Fences

Mend Fences-a while fence around a field, clouds overheadI love fences.

I know some people say, “Don’t fence me in,” meaning they want their freedom. I like freedom too. Still, I enjoy the beauty of fences.

  • Fences give order.
  • They look neat.
  • Sometimes they provide safety.

However, we need to mend (repair) fences occasionally.

  • Fences break.
  • They need paint.
  • Animals damage them.
  • They start leaning the wrong way.
  • They get dirty.

If we don’t mend them, they won’t stay safe, neat, orderly, and beautiful.

Occasionally we need to mend fences in our relationships.

  • We disagree, argue, or fight.
  • We neglect one another.
  • Hard times hurt us.
  • We let others lead us the wrong way.
  • We betray one another.

We mend fences when we improve our relationships.

How do we do that? We learn to:

  • Disagree without arguing or fighting
  • Spend special time together
  • Refuse to follow bad examples
  • Support one another through hard times
  • Apologize when we do wrong

Of course, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If we take care of our relationships every day, we don’t have to spend so much time mending them. That seems a small price to pay for a safe, neat, orderly, beautiful relationship.

“Turn us back to You, O Lord, and we will be restored; Renew our days as of old” (Lamentations 5:21 NKJV).

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