self-improvement Archives - Diana Derringer

Milktoast

March 24, 2025 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

I don’t want milktoast for breakfast or any other meal. Although I like milk and toast, I prefer them separate. I also want more flavor. Even with sugar, cinnamon, or other spices added, it remains a bland dish. Give me eggs or cereal with fruit and nuts.

Neither do I want to be a milktoast person or give milktoast responses. However, I have been guilty of both.

Milktoast means weak or ineffective.

It can be a noun or an adjective. The person or response is:

Timid
Fearful
Unwilling to rock the boat
Boring
Wishy-washy

Milquetoast mean the same.

According to The Free Dictionary, the character description refers to H. T. Webster’s comic strip character, Caspar Milquetoast. Like edible milktoast (or milk toast), Caspar had a bland personality.

Milktoast is easy to digest.

With so little flavor, it does not upset the body’s system. Neither do weak people upset their social systems of:

Business
Government
Religion
Families

They value the status quo above truth or progress.

God seeks boldness in service.

Certainly, quietness and meekness are often appropriate. Yet, God expects and provides courage when the time comes to speak up and stand tall.

“Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness” (Acts 4:29 NIV).

Thanks to Gail Johnson for the suggestion and to Jeri Gumm Stone for the photo.

The Early Bird Gets the Worm Matin Wiles book — Version 1.0.0

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So Tight They Squeak When They Walk

March 17, 2025 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

One of my high school teachers could never sneak up on our class. We could hear his squeaky shoes from the far end of the hall. He was not like some people who are so tight they squeak when they walk. He simply had squeaky shoes.

So tight they squeak when they walk means extremely stingy.

Similar expressions include:

Tightwad
Tightfisted
Cheapskate
Tight as bark on a tree

Turning loose of money or possessions hurts such people worse than a toothache. They refuse to give to others. Often, they fail to buy what they need themselves. They suffer rather than let go of what they own.

People so tight they squeak when they walk go far beyond thrifty.

Thrifty people save for a rainy day. They remain ready for emergencies. However, they also spend as needed now. Those so tight they squeak when they walk don’t want to spend even when emergencies arise.

They can’t take it with them, so why hang on so tightly now?

How sad to never experience the joy of sharing. Both they and a world of others lose when they ignore opportunities for good.

The owner becomes the owned.

“Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment” (1 Timothy 6:17 NIV).

Thanks to J.D. Wininger for the suggestion and to Laura Mitchell Wilds and Billy Joe Douglas with Mitchell’s for the photo.

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Stinking Thinking

February 17, 2025 Diana Derringer Comments 8 comments

Just as we avoid a skunk’s stinking spray, we want to avoid stinking thinking. We accomplish nothing when we focus on messages like:

Woe is me.
I’m awful.
You’re awful.
The whole world is awful.
Life is awful.
Nothing will ever get better.

Do you see a pattern here?

Stinking thinking means negative thinking.

We see only the wrong, never the right. Everything and everyone ruffle our feathers.

Rather than happy-go-lucky we remain:

Pessimistic
Down in the dumps
Certain of failure

Focused on problems, our outlook grows progressively worse.

*Stinking thinking can lead to emotional problems.

After long stretches of negative self-talk, we have a tough time changing. Our thinking, feelings, and actions grow worse. As our stress level increases, tolerance decreases.

God offers a better life.

The one and only God who created the world created us. God also:

Loves us
Has a special plan for us
Forgives us when we repent of our wrongs
Gives eternal life and a home in heaven to all who follow Jesus

That should give us a positive outlook on life. Don’t you agree?

“Their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened” (Romans 1:21 NIV).

Thanks to Becky Nash Rowe for the suggestion. Photo by Jack Bulmer on Pexels.

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*Seek professional help if needed to overcome extreme negative thought patterns.

Feet of Clay

February 10, 2025 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

How often do we admire people and think they can do no wrong? Yet, we eventually learn they have feet of clay.

Feet of clay means a failure or weakness.

We have faults. Our heroes have faults. No matter how hard we try to be perfect, everyone falls short of perfection.

This idiom originated in the Bible.

Daniel 2 tells the story of King Nebuchadnezzar and a dream he could not understand. God revealed the dream and its meaning to Daniel, one of the king’s captives. In the dream, a statue had:

A head of gold
A body of silver, bronze, and iron
Feet of iron and clay

A large rock hit the feet, and the statue crumbled.

Daniel told the king his dream meant the Babylonian kingdom would fall. However, God’s kingdom would last forever.

Because we have feet of clay, we find hope only in our Creator.

If we rely on ourselves, we fall flat. However, God’s strength and guidance enable us to stand firm. Like Daniel, may we faithfully follow the one and only true God.

“Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his” (Daniel 2:20 NIV).

Thanks to Meghan Bowker, editor of Missions Mosaic magazine, for the idea. Photo by Matt Seymour on Unsplash.

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Wouldn’t be Caught Dead in It

December 16, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 4 comments

When we see an ugly Christmas sweater, we might say we wouldn’t be caught dead in it. However, cute puppies can wear whatever they want, including ugly sweaters, and still look cute.

Wouldn’t be caught dead in it refers to at least two possibilities.

Clothing
Places

We don’t always agree on clothing choices.

Styles come and go. However, some of us choose to wear what we like regardless of the latest trend. That includes our favorite Christmas sweaters, shirts, or jackets.

Likewise, we may love places other people would never go.

That holds true for:

Expensive versus inexpensive stores
Gourmet versus fast food restaurants
Resorts versus camping trips
High priced versus third world countries

Many of us wouldn’t be caught dead in Jesus’ circumstances on earth.

The creator of the world:

Was born to a poor family
Slept in a feeding trough
Received little respect from the high and mighty
Died on a criminal’s cross
Was buried in a borrowed tomb

Yet, Jesus offers the world an eternal home in heaven.

Jesus walked out of that borrowed tomb, victorious over sin and death. If we follow Jesus, we share that victory. Because of His humble life on earth, we can look forward to the glory of heaven

“She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them” (Luke 2:7 NIV).

Thanks to Joy S. Taylor for the suggestion. Image by Christiana from Pixabay.

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In the Wings

December 9, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 4 comments

Before little angels appear in Christmas performances, they wait in the wings. They stay off stage, ready to make their entrance.

In the wings means ready to do something.

Resources, people or other, remain available to help. They prepare to act at a moment’s notice. However, they linger in the background until needed.

The expression has an acting origin.

According to The Free Dictionary, “In a theatre, the wings are the hidden areas to the left and right of a stage, where the actors wait before going on to the stage.”

People may remain in the wings for several reasons.

In addition to general help, they may wait to:

Replace someone.
Make information public.
Offer special services.

At Christmas, we remember that Jesus waited in the wings before coming to earth.

He remained ready to appear, God’s light to the world. Yet, He waited for the right:

Time
Place
Plan

May we follow Jesus’ example by responding:

When God calls
Where God leads
According to God’s purpose

Whether we wait in the wings or step out to follow, we receive what we need under God’s wings,

“When the set time had fully come, God sent his Son” (Galatians 4:4 NIV).

Thanks to Cathy Chinn for the suggestion Photo by Ksenia Chernaya with Pexels.

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Tipping Point

November 25, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 6 comments

This turtle has reached a tipping point. Small movements will pop him out of the water pan and onto the ground.

Tipping point means a critical moment when small actions cause great change.

That change may be in:

Ideas
Behavior
Words

It may affect one person or thing, or it may affect many.

Tipping points occur in all areas of life.

Businesses
Governments
Homes
Churches

The change may be gradual at first.

This turtle inched his way to the edge of the pan. Little happened when he started. However, he has now reached a decisive moment. What happens next is up in the air. Will he continue forward or go back?

Some tipping points result from the choices of others.

They may or may not seek input from those they affect.

Other tipping points result from personal choices.

Everyone has influence, whether small or great. Everyone also lives with the results of their choices.

Stay on the right track. Choose well the direction your life will take.

“Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve … But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15 NIV).

Thanks to Tracy Crump for the suggestion and the photo.

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Air Your Dirty Laundry in Public

October 28, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 4 comments

Please don’t air your dirty laundry in public. Unfortunately, that has become a common practice. All too often, people share more information than necessary or desired.

If you air your dirty laundry in public, you discuss personal information that should remain private.

Similar expressions include:

Wash your dirty laundry in public.
Wash your dirty linen in public.

When you air your dirty laundry in public, you risk embarrassing yourself and others.

People remember such information, and it can cause problems for years.

Social media makes airing dirty laundry easy and widespread.

Even if you delete a post, the information remains out there. People copy, save, and share it. If you don’t want it spread, don’t say or write it. Keep private information private.

A wise teacher suggested asking yourself three questions before saying anything.

Although often applied to busybodies who spread gossip about others, they also pertain to personal information.

Is it true?
Is it kind?
Will it glorify God?

If you can’t give a positive answer to all those questions, leave it unsaid. Don’t discuss it or argue about it in public. Too much negative information already exists. When you blow off steam around others, you simply add to the damage.

“Your daily lives should not embarrass God but bring joy to him who invited you into his Kingdom to share his glory” ( 1 Thessalonians 2:12 TLB).

Thanks to Jeri Stone for the suggestion.

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Right Off the Bat

October 7, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 4 comments

When a batter hits a ball, that ball flies right off the bat. While the ball soars through the air, the batter runs toward first base without delay.

Right off the bat means immediately.

We don’t hesitate. Instead, we act:

Instantly
First thing

Rather than sit and ponder the possibilities, we move almost spontaneously.

We value first responders who act right off the bat.

Their speed often makes the difference in life and death.

Fire fighters
Law enforcement
Medical personnel

We don’t want precise workers to act right off the bat.

Their speed results in costly errors or conclusions.

Scientists
Accountants
Builders

For them, haste makes waste. If we demand their work immediately if not sooner, we suffer in the end.

May we always choose wisely between patience and speed.

Much in life is worth the wait. Yet, we never want to postpone decisions that require an immediate response.

Without delay [Jesus] called them, and they … followed him (Mark 1:20 NIV).

Thanks to Darrin Jenkins for the suggestion and to Richard Robards for the photo.

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Foot in the Door

September 30, 2024 Diana Derringer Comments 8 comments

My friend Collin White recently got his foot in the door for a lifelong dream. He performed on stage at the Grand Ole Opry. For anyone, that is quite a feat (pun intended). For a young man still in college, it’s nothing short of amazing.

To get a foot in the door means the first step toward a goal.

Collin wants to sing professionally. He already sings in community, school, church, and multi-state events. He has released two songs. Both fit the Christian country genre. His dream is falling into place, one step at a time.

To get a foot in the door occasionally refers to a pushy person.

Such people use aggressive tactics. Door-to-door salespeople who stick their feet in doors so homeowners can’t close them come to mind. Their behavior often proves self-defeating (another pun intended). Instead of reaching their goals, they turn people against them.

That does not describe Collin. Instead, he puts his best foot forward.

The greatest door of opportunity remains open for all.

Jesus extends an invitation for:

Forgiveness
Salvation
Guidance
A home in heaven.

Never pushy, Jesus waits patiently for our response. It’s up to us to invite Jesus into our lives and to follow Him.

“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me” (Revelation 3:20 NIV).

Thanks to Tracy Crump and Beckham Wilson for the suggestion and to Jill and Steve Floyd and Collin White for the photos.

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