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Category: Relationships

Head over Heels

Head over Heels

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Head over Heels morgue file8161310074013Have you ever been head over heels in love?

  • You were so in love you did not know up from down.
  • You acted silly but didn’t care.
  • You wanted to spend every single minute with your loved one.

Have you later realized that was not true love?

So often we get the meaning of true love all wrong. We focus on the temporary:

  • Physical attraction
  • Common interests
  • Popularity
  • Desire to love or be close to someone

None of those are necessarily bad. However, true love means so much more. Love that lasts means moving beyond puppy love to:

  • Commitment to the loved one, regardless of circumstances
  • Willingness to give 100 percent, not 50-50
  • Being there for one another when life gets hard

At the same time, we want to keep true love lovely by:

  • Talking and laughing with one another
  • Sharing fun times
  • Hugging and saying “I love you” often

That helps keep us head over heels in love with our loved one for life.

Above all, we want to follow the ultimate example of love – Jesus’ unconditional, sacrificial love.

“You have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes” (Song of Solomon 4:9 NIV).

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Photo courtesy of morgueFile.

Go Against the Grain

Go Against the Grain

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Go Against the Grain 2 morguefile6631240571960If we work with wood, we don’t usually go against the grain. We work in the natural direction of the wood’s fibers. That is true whether we work with new wood or old. It is also true whether we:

  • Sand the wood to make it smooth
  • Paint or stain it
  • Clean or polish it

Years ago, I put new stain on a beautiful piece of furniture. In one spot, I brushed against the grain. That one mistake stood out from all the rest.

In life, if we go against the grain, we go against what we want to do. That often means standing firm  against popular opinion.

Our natural desire leads us to follow the crowd. Standing firm for what we believe can be difficult when few people stand with us. Yet, the crowd is not always right.

So how do we decide the direction to go?

Avoid

  • Going along with everyone else just because it is easy
  • Going against the grain simply for attention

Do

  • Educate ourselves
  • Choose what is right, whether it goes against the grain or not.

“Hold on to what is good, reject every kind of evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:21-22 NIV).

Thanks to Suellen Shaw for the idea.

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Photo courtesy of morgueFile.

Second Fiddle

Second Fiddle

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Second Fiddle 4-Rachel DeCourseyI can’t play a fiddle – first fiddle or second fiddle. I tried to learn from my father. My efforts were not successful.

Fiddle is another name for violin. The music style makes it different.

In an orchestra, second violin supports the first violin. First violin usually plays melody while second violin plays harmony. As the name suggests, second violin has a secondary role.

Therefore, if we play second fiddle to someone, the other person gets noticed more. She gets more credit. People often think the second fiddle role is less important or second best. For example, a vice president plays second fiddle to president.

Four things we need to remember about playing second fiddle:

1. Someone needs to play second fiddle.
2. With hard work, we may someday play first.
3. Both roles are important.
4. The two together make beautiful music.

Whether we lead or play second fiddle, let’s play to the best of our ability.

“Praise him with the sounding of the trumpet,
praise him with the harp and lyre,
praise him with timbrel and dancing,
praise him with the strings and pipe,
praise him with the clash of cymbals,
praise him with resounding cymbals.
Let everything that has breath praise the LORD” (Psalm 150:3-6 NIV).

Thanks to Rachel DeCoursey for the Campbellsville University orchestra photo.

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Watch Your Step

Watch Your Step

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Watch Your Step“You better watch your step.” Have you heard that from a parent, teacher, or boss? When it happens, we know we have pushed all the wrong buttons. We are in trouble or soon will be, unless we change our behavior.

If we don’t watch our step when we walk or run, we fall. Falls frequently occur because of:

  • Wet leaves on steps
  • Not paying attention (Having our head in the clouds)
  • Stepping on rocks, holes, or toys

If we fail to watch our step in relationships, we risk:

  • Offending other people
  • Earning a bad reputation
  • Suffering personal problems

Falls can happen quickly. That is true in any situation.

  • Sometimes we cause falls ourselves.
  • Sometimes other people cause them.
  • Sometimes they are no one’s fault.

As a result, we want to use caution — to watch our step.

  • Prevent the mistakes we can.
  • Prepare for the mistakes that happen.
  • Pick ourselves up when we fall.

Let’s learn from the steps we take, both good and bad.

“I have considered my ways and have turned my steps to your statutes” (Psalm 119: 59 NIV).

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Tightfisted

Tightfisted

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TightfistedFew people want to be called tightfisted or closefisted. We don’t like to be known as selfish or cheap. A tightfisted person hates giving or spending money. They want to keep it all for themselves.

However, we can be tightfisted with more than money. Too often we fail to share our time and love. We need those much more.

  • How many children wish for more time and love from parents?
  • How many husbands or wives wish for more time and love from a spouse?
  • How many people live alone, thinking no one cares?

We can do something about the needs around us. If we are tightfisted, it is never too late to change. Ebenezer Scrooge in A Christmas Carol provides a perfect example.

Of course, we want to use what we own wisely. We need to save money for future needs. At the same time, most of us can give far more than we do. With money, time, and love, let’s freely share.

The Gaither video Give It Away includes a scene of children receiving Operation Christmas Child shoe boxes filled with gifts. What a great reminder that we can make our world a better place to live.

This Thanksgiving, let’s give thanks for what we have. Then let’s open our tight fists and share with others. After all, we can’t take it with us.

“Freely you have received; freely give” (Matthew 10:8 NIV).

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True Colors

True Colors

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True ColorsI love the explosion of colors every fall.

  • Leaves turn red, yellow, and orange.
  • Pumpkins appear in gardens, yards, and stores.
  • Flowers bloom in every color of the rainbow.

People’s true colors may not be so pleasant or so easily seen. Those with evil plans try to hide them. Their real attitudes, plans, or opinions may not be clear until they hurt us.

At the same time, discovering other people’s true colors can provide pure joy.

  • The fun-loving nature of a shy person
  • The hidden talents of a singer, artist, or actor
  • The kind heart of someone when needs arise

As we enjoy this beautiful time of year, may it remind us of the one who made such beauty possible. May our true colors reflect the splendor of our loving creator.

“He has shown kindness by giving you rain from heaven and crops in their seasons; he provides you with plenty of food and fills your hearts with joy” (Acts 14:17 NIV).

What is your favorite time of year?

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Hardheaded

Hardheaded

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HardheadedAre you hardheaded? The following test may help you decide.

1. Do you always want everything your way?
2. Do you refuse to listen to other opinions?
3. Do you have a hard time changing your mind?
4. Do other people call you stubborn? Worse, do they call you stubborn as a mule?

People have different levels of stubbornness or hardheadedness. Some are hardheaded about everything all the time. Others are a little hardheaded part-time.

Strong opinions can be helpful. Presidents and other leaders must stand firm on certain issues. At the same time, they must be willing to listen to all sides of any issue. That was true for the presidents carved on Mt. Rushmore. It remains true for leaders today.

A great plan for both leaders and followers: Listen well. Decide carefully.

“They have become as hardheaded as a rock. They refuse to change their ways” (Jeremiah 5:3 NET).

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You Can’t Take It with You

You Can’t Take It with You

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You Can't Take It with You“You can’t take it with you.” “I’ve never seen a hearse with a trailer behind it.” Both expressions tell us that when we die, we leave our possessions behind.

So, why do we become so concerned about what we own? Those things won’t last.

What we spend most of our lives collecting will someday belong to someone else. Or they may be  thrown in the trash or recycled. Yet, we keep buying stuff we don’t need, trying to live high on the hog.

A missionary friend once laughed and said she enjoys “returning to America every four years to learn what the latest gadgets are that we cannot live without.”

She knows what matters most can’t be purchased with cash, check, or credit card:

  • The love of family
  • A true friend
  • Peace of mind
  • Purpose for living
  • An eternal home in heaven

A meaningful life has no price tag. Why not make our lives more meaningful? Instead of buying useless items, why not spend our money for:

  • Disaster relief
  • World hunger
  • Scholarships
  • Church and missions programs
  • Crisis ministries

We live on earth such a brief time. If you can’t take it with you, why worry about it now? Let’s invest in true riches!

“Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21 NIV).

What are your favorite charities?

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Fill Someone’s Shoes

Fill Someone’s Shoes

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Fill Someone's ShoesCharli likes to wear her parents’ shoes. She tries so hard to fill them, but she can’t. Her parents have big shoes to fill.

We often say it will be hard to fill someone’s shoes when that person leaves a position. We also say the person left big shoes to fill. We mean:

  • The person did a good job.
  • We will have a hard time finding someone else that good.
  • The next person will have to work hard to do as well.

None of us can fill someone’s shoes like that person. We may get close. Some people may see no difference. Yet differences remain.

That is true for:

  • Teachers
  • Business leaders
  • Family members
  • Anyone

We each fill our shoes in our own way. God made only one Charli. God made only one me. God made only one you.

Great workers and leaders challenge us to do our best. Yet, we will always be who we are. Therefore, Charli needs to be the best Charli possible. I need to be the best me possible. You need to be the best you possible.

Let’s all leave big shoes to fill.

“Work hard so God can say to you, “Well done.” Be a good workman, one who does not need to be ashamed when God examines your work” (2 Timothy 2:15 TLB).

Thanks to Natalie Parker for the photo.

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Fly off the Handle

Fly off the Handle

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Fly off the HandleDon’t fly off the handle — helpful advice for axes and for people.

An ax can do great good or great harm. Its heavy metal blade cuts through wood. That wood can provide heat, art, building supplies, and more

However, if the ax blade flies off the handle, look out. Anyone nearby is in danger of injury or death.

Likewise, anger can do great good or great harm. Controlled anger helps us:

  • Speak against evil.
  • Right a wrong.
  • Change ourselves.
  • Lead others to change.

However, we often let anger get out of control. Anger controls us rather than our controlling the anger. We fly off the handle (lose our temper). As a result, we suffer and cause others to suffer.

With an ax, we want to:

  • Keep it in good repair.
  • Hold the handle firmly.
  • Cut wood and never hurt people.

With anger we want to:

  • Understand its cause and purpose.
  • Keep it firmly controlled.
  • Use it for good, not harm.

Remember to treat anger like water off a duck’s back. Use it in a positive way, and gain tools for a better life.

An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins. (Proverbs 29:22)

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