Relationships Archives - Page 31 of 35

As Old as the Hills

November 18, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 4 comments

Do you ever feel as old as the hills? It is possible whether we are 18 or 80.

The hills of Kentucky have existed longer than any of us have lived. So have most hills and mountains. That does not stop us from saying people or possessions are as old as the hills.

• Those of us who hate to shop wear clothes as old as the hills.
• When tired, we feel as old as the hills.
• We describe well-worn furniture as old as the hills.

Our society values youth. Many people think older adults are over the hill.

They don’t understand the benefits that come with age.

• Years of experience
• Wisdom from life lessons
• Appreciation for how fast time passes

Regardless of how old we are or how old we feel, let’s give thanks for:

• Every age
• The beauty of the hills around us
• The one who created all

“Were you born before the hills were made?” (Job 15:7 NIV).

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Low Man on the Totem Pole

November 4, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 2 comments

Totem poles are carved and painted by Native Americans in the northwest part of North America.

According to dictionary.com, comedian Fred Allen probably started our saying “low man on the totem pole” around 1940. The phrase became popular “despite its lack of application to a genuine totem pole.”

The low man on the totem pole is often considered the least important person in a group.

He holds the lowest position.
Others show him little respect.
He usually has to do the work no one else wants to do.

A new person in an organization may refer to himself as low man on the totem pole.

Nevertheless, the low man on the totem pole has hope.

Everyone must begin somewhere. Most begin at the bottom and then work their way up to the position they desire.

Some people prefer a lower position. In addition, the person at the top cannot do what he needs to do without the people who work below him.

People at the bottom are needed as much as those at the top.

Often they are needed more.

If the lowest image on a totem pole is destroyed, the totem pole can no longer stand. Repairs may help, but the totem pole will never be the same. That truth applies to organizations as well. Therefore, my hat’s off to all who serve as low man on the totem pole.

Click here for further information about totem poles.

“Work happily together. Don’t try to act big. Don’t try to get into the good graces of important people, but enjoy the company of ordinary folks. And don’t think you know it all!” (Romans 12:16 TLB).

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As Friendly as a Puppy

October 28, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 0 Comment

If you own a puppy, you know the joy of complete acceptance. That puppy loves you. He doesn’t care about your status:

Who you are
What you have done
How you look
What you say

He wants to be with you. He remains your friend through thick and thin.

A puppy knows how to have fun. He finds pleasure in the little things.

Chewing on a bone
Chasing a ball
Running and jumping

If you let him, he will share his joy with you:

Snuggling close to you
Barking for attention
Letting you scratch his ears or rub his tummy

A puppy can turn frowns into smiles simply by being a puppy.

His behavior may change when you hurt:

Sitting still beside you
Listening as you talk or cry
Whimpering to share your grief
Offering an occasional lick of love

A puppy gives his friendship without criticism or judgment.

When he thinks you’re in danger, his behavior changes again:

Barking to warn you
Trying to pull you to safety
Not quitting until you move

Why can’t we all be as friendly as a puppy?

“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24 NIV).

Special thanks to the Bloyd family. Their photo of pure puppy joy reminds us that puppies are also good medicine.

Do you have a favorite puppy tale? If so, please comment.

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Eating Out of Her Hand

October 14, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

During a stop in South Dakota, my friend Ann had this chipmunk eating out of her hand. Because of his appetite, he did what Ann desired.

She offered what he wanted, so he ignored any possible danger. He failed to follow the caution better safe than sorry.

Sometimes people have us eating out of their hands. We do whatever they want. This happens often in romantic relationships. We see it when Olivia Newton-John sings “Hopelessly Devoted to You” in the movie Grease.

In a good relationship, eating out of one another’s hand presents no danger.

We seek to please the one we love.

We give gifts.
We arrange special events.
We spend a lot of time together.

Unfortunately, some people take advantage of that desire to please.

As a result, those eating out of their hands suffer in several possible ways:

Abuse (physical, emotional, or sexual)
Neglect
Financial loss

Choose relationships wisely.

Seek help when needed. Encourage others to make good decisions.

With a mighty hand and outstretched arm; His love endures forever (Psalm 136:12 NIV).

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One Good Turn Deserves Another

September 16, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

Most children who ride a carousel (merry-go-round) don’t want to get off. They beg for one more ride — one more turn. They want to keep that good feeling going.

If someone does something good for us, we usually want to do a good deed for them. One good turn deserves another expresses that idea. We want to keep that good feeling — that good relationship — going.

But why stop there?

Why wait for someone else to do the first good deed?

A popular idea in recent years is the Random Act of Kindness Day. On that day each year, people do something good for others for no special reason. The day receives a great deal of publicity, and people feel good about it.

I appreciate those efforts. Yet, that’s just once a year. What keeps us from performing random acts of kindness every day? Our kind acts don’t have to be big. In fact, the small kindnesses often mean the most.

A greater challenge is to be kind to those who are unkind to us.

Think about the difference in our world if we practiced that.

Some people might be so surprised they stop their cruel acts.
Other people might think we’re crazy and continue their unkind behavior.
A few might wonder what causes us to act that way and desire a similar life for themselves.

Why not give it a try and see what happens? In a world filled with conflict, let’s be like a carousel and keep the good turns going.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:43-44 NIV).

Thanks to Debbie Tapscott for the suggestion.

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Don’t Fence Me In

September 9, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 2 comments

If animals could talk, I think most would say, “Don’t fence me in.” Farmers and ranchers regularly repair fences where cows, horses, or other animals escape.

We may not have physical fences around us. Yet, many of us feel fenced in by circumstances:

Responsibilities
Other people
Lack of personal space
Little time alone

Because of that, we can understand the popularity of the 1934 cowboy song “Don’t Fence Me In.” Robert (Bob) Fletcher of Montana wrote the original lyrics. We can still enjoy much that he wrote about in parts of our great country today.

We explore wide open spaces.
We drive for miles without seeing another person.
We feel free.
Our minds, as well as our bodies, can roam.

Whether we like country life or not, we desire freedom. We want to go, do, and speak as we please. We don’t like people telling us what we can and cannot do.

However, a fence has more than one purpose. We focus on what a fence keeps inside. Equally important is the danger it may keep outside.

With no limits, we live in total confusion. We need fences (rules) to provide order and protection.

Our freedom must do no wrong.

“Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil” (1 Peter 2:16).

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Full of Hot Air

September 2, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 0 Comment

Look inside a hot air balloon. What do you see? Nothing.

The balloon is full of hot air.

The air keeps the balloon going. We hear sound as the burner keeps filling the balloon with air. However, we see nothing.

When people talk a lot but say nothing important, we say they are full of hot air.

They talk foolishness. Like the noise of the air going into the balloon, we might also say they talk to hear their heads roar.

Such people can be fun for a while, but they do us no good if we want to learn. If we desire intelligent conversation, we look for someone else.

What about us?

How often are we full of hot air?

As Abraham Lincoln said, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”

If we have nothing useful to add to a serious conversation, perhaps we should keep quiet.

“Entirely out of place is obscene, silly, and vulgar talk; but instead, let there be thanksgiving” (Ephesians 5:4 NRSV).

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Stand Firm

August 12, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 9 comments

The lighthouse at Peggy’s Cove in Nova Scotia reminds us to stand firm.

Built in an area of great beauty, its original purpose had nothing to do with beauty. Like all lighthouses, it had work to do.

Stand tall enough to be seen by ships at sea.
Spread its light so it could be seen at night.
Monitor weather conditions.
Warn ships of danger.

Because of their locations, lighthouses face attacks from water, wind, and erosion.

Their personal dangers never keep them from doing their job.

They stand firm – never moving, never quitting.

Because of personal differences, people sometimes disagree.

We can handle those disagreements three ways.

Compromise.
Accept the other person’s position.
Stand firm.

Either of the first two will work, if they cause no harm. I usually prefer those choices.

However, if harm will result from the first two, we must stand firm. Regardless of the consequences, we must refuse to change our thought or actions. We must not move. We must not quit.

Like lighthouses, we have work to do.

Make the truth visible.
Apply it to current conditions.
Warn others when they approach danger.

“Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love” (1 Corinthians 16:13-14 NIV).

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My Hat’s Off to You

July 29, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

To show honor, respect, or admiration, I might say, “My hat’s off to you.” Years ago, men would often remove their hats and bow in a lady’s presence. They would also remove their hats before people in authority.

These ladies were part of a volunteer team that worked in our church’s recent Vacation Bible School.

The work was tiring.
The children were active.
The workers could have spent their week doing much easier tasks.

Yet, they love children and understand the value of that time.

The children sang, played games, made crafts, ate snacks, heard stories, and more. In the process, they learned eternal life lessons.

After their week’s work, this group selected a day for fun. Their destination: Martha’s Tearoom at Emerald Acres in Glendale, Kentucky.

Martha told everyone to choose a hat before the tea. Once seated, the workers feasted. They laughed. They told stories. They shared concerns.

We need more people like these wonderful women who make our world a better place. Ladies, my hat’s off to you.

How can we thank God enough for you, for all the joy we feel because of you before our God? (1 Thessalonians 3:9 NET).

Who has influenced your life? Please comment.

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Out on a Limb

July 22, 2014 Diana Derringer Comments 1 comment

Have you seen the cartoon of a man sitting out on a limb? He’s sawing off the limb between himself and the tree. We laugh because we know that when the limb falls, so will he. Yet, he remains unaware.

The bear cub in this photo may not be out on a limb yet. However, we know if he tries to crawl out any of those tiny limbs, he too will fall.

We often fail to see the dangers around us.

Like the man and the bear cub, we cause many of those dangers ourselves.

Marriages fall apart because of harmless flirting.
Addictions result from trying just one drink or drug.
Bankruptcies occur when we can no longer pay all those little charges.

If we never take that first dangerous step, we don’t have to worry about falling.

Let’s take preventive steps instead.

Weigh the good and bad.
Make well-informed decisions.
Set reasonable limits in every part of our lives.

Let’s not put ourselves at risk. Let’s choose not to go out on a limb.

“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord” (Lamentations 3:40 NIV).

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